Thursday, March 3, 2011

The Ills of Social Networking

I might have faux-pax'd - I engaged enraged Britney Spears fans in a contest of wits on Twitter...and might have lost.

As I sit here, decompressing from this afternoon's Teamsters' Local 455 Rally, I looked through my hundreds of tweets and saw a trending tag: #tilltheworldends. Out of curiosity, I clicked.

And immediately saw my mistake.

The battle scene I stumbled upon is tough to describe. Smoke filled the air. The screams and anguish of the wounded were a constant hum in my ears. And the fallen. Oh, the fallen.

The war waged on, intensifying with each Twitter Tweet update. 3, maybe 4 second go by, and there are 20 new Tweet soldiers ready to fight to the death.

This is no ordinary war, though. It is a multi-front extravaganza. We have the die hard Britney fans, who keep sending reinforcements to prove that #TillTheWorldEnds in not a fill in the blank thingy, but is, in fact, her new album. (As if that improves anything?)

Then we have the Bieber-fans. It seems we are gearing up for a Britney-Bieber show off, the pop-queen-that-was and the pop-queen-that-is, until the stoners enter the battle (somewhat confused). Their attack is one-sided, consistent, and constant, as if the only thing the stoners can do is click "retweet." Their battle cry (dry-throated-cough?):

"Ima smoke WEED #tilltheworldends."

And the battle rages on....

(oh crap, 156 new tweets...)